[AI translation] Dear Brothers and Sisters! One of the most significant events in the life of the first Christian church after Pentecost was undoubtedly the conversion of a highly learned and authoritative Pharisee named Saul. One can imagine the astonishment and horror with which the disciples of Jesus gave the news by word of mouth that this sworn enemy of Jesus, a fearsome persecutor of Christ and Christians, had surrendered to Jesus, had yielded to Jesus. A strange shudder must have gone through the hearts of the Christians when Saul, this dreaded enemy, first appeared in their midst and told them not to fear him, that he was no longer an enemy, but a brother, a friend, a slave of Jesus. He completely abolished his former ways, even changing his name, and as the apostle Paul he travelled through almost all parts of the then known world, everywhere proclaiming the death and resurrection of Christ. We are all too used to this Pauline reversal, but, Brothers and Sisters, something quite extraordinary and great miraculous happened here, and at the heart of it was undoubtedly the experience of the Damascus road, in which Jesus revealed his living reality to this Saul. I could not say what the light was that beamed around him from heaven so that he fell to earth - a vision, a lightning strike, or really some heavenly sign, a celestial phenomenon - it is not important, that is not the point. The point is that the risen Jesus declared his living reality to this man in such a vitally surprising way that he heard his voice. He did not see Jesus... he heard his voice. He heard this heart-shaking declaration, "I am Jesus!" He had heard a lot about Jesus before, because the people he had taken to Jerusalem, tortured, tormented, had told him a lot about Jesus, but there is a huge difference between hearing about Jesus and hearing Jesus. And now I want to preach the Word so that while I am talking about Jesus, your soul hears Jesus himself!I am convinced that through this very well-known story, Jesus himself is speaking to us now. For every time the Word of God is spoken among us, Jesus appears, the invisible but real Jesus, as if to say: "I am Jesus!" Do you hear? Through this story, someone is now here, invisible but real, saying to us, "I am Jesus!" Behold, here, from this story, we see above all the power of Jesus, that extraordinary and wonderful power. I could almost say: nowhere is his true power more visible than in the transformation of the life of this man called Saul. Imagine if, before he set out on the Damascus road, someone had pointed out to Saul, "Look, this man, who is a sworn enemy of Jesus, who has made it his life's goal to eradicate Christianity as a harmful superstition, who considers it a scandalous delusion, this man will soon become Jesus' most faithful disciple, his apostle... for Christ". If someone had pointed it out in this way, no one would have believed it, Saul himself would have laughed most cynically, most indignantly. Anyone else the Christians of the day could have imagined as a Christ-follower among themselves as a minister of the Gospel, but not this man. If any one among the Christians of that day had said to his fellows, "I will go to him, I will try to convince him of the truth of the gospel," they would have waved him down, they would have said: "Oh, leave him, it's no use, he'll never be bacon!" And behold, Jesus showed that nothing is impossible for Him. And He did not use any violence against him, He simply stood in front of him, called him by name, and when Saul heard His voice and asked, "Who are you?" He said, "I am Jesus, whom you are chasing!" And this unheard-of hard rock melted from one moment to the next, almost like ice in the sunlight, and its might, its proud tower of strength, crumbled under the impact of this word, as the walls of Jericho once did at the blast of trumpets. There is no way to analyse it, to psychologise it, to interpret it this way or that way: here was something so moving in the life of this man, as Jeremiah says: "You have taken hold of me, Lord, and overcome me!"
Because when Jesus, in his invisible yet living reality, stands before someone, addresses him and says: "I am Jesus!", then all human logic is over, all reasoning, dialectical insight, debate or argumentation is over - there is only one feeling, devastating yet exalting: that I am in the power of God, that I am conquered by God! And this is what happened to Saul, not to make us dream, "Well, how wonderful", but to know that such is the power of Jesus. The Jesus who died, the Jesus who rose again, the Jesus who went to heaven. Yes, Brothers and Sisters, this story is not written to be admired as an old story, an interesting story, among other things, but to know the power of Jesus, which is not only that He once created the world, that He set the vast world of the solar system in motion by the word of His power, that He divided the Red Sea in two, or raised Lazarus from the dead and walked on the waters, but above all, and most relevant to us, that He has such power over a human life that He can make a Saul into the apostle Paul.
I remember it very well, I was struck for the first time, I was struck by the reality of the power of Jesus when I saw it in the life of a man. When I saw an acquaintance of mine, who I knew very well had led a sordid, sordid life, years later at an evangelistic conference, and I was convinced by his words, by his behaviour, that this man had become a very different person from the one he had started out as. I was amazed at what had happened to him. His eyes had cleared, he radiated peace, goodness, love - his face almost glowed with an inner happiness, freed from the bondage of his old, cursed passions. And when he told me that Jesus had done all this to him, a very strange shudder went through my soul, and through this man's changed life I seemed to hear this voice: "I am Jesus! You see, I have such power over people's lives, over your life too." And oh, how many times since then have I seen and experienced in my own life and in the lives of others that - believe me, Brothers and Sisters - there is no depth of human life, no depth of sin, no depth of bondage, no depth of terrible power from which Jesus cannot deliver man. And there is no life so vile, so wicked, so cursed, so depraved, that once Jesus takes it into His hands, He cannot use it in the service of His glory. I don't know if you have any sin that you have been struggling against for a long time, but in vain, because you feel it is stronger than you... Whether there is any harmful quality in your nature which has already caused so much trouble, so much pain to the people around you... Whether you have ever felt that it would be good to become different, truer, more useful, because it is not good the way it is, but you can't, but in vain, you can't, you can't...
At the service this morning we sang a hymn, one line of which goes. I don't know if you've ever felt - I've felt it many times - that a person resigns, resigns to himself, says: "This is how I am... I am what I am... I can't help it...". Through this story, the Spirit is saying: "Don't resign yourself to being the way you are! What you cannot do, Jesus can do!"
Through this story, invisible but real, Someone is here, standing in front of you and saying, "I am Jesus! You cannot conquer your sins, but I can. You cannot break your bondage, but I can. You do not have the strength to forgive this or that, but I can give you the strength. You are unable to reconcile with your fate, but I can reconcile you. You are unable to truly love someone, but I can do it with your heart. You cannot become a blessing in this world, but I can make you a blessing... Well, I am Jesus, that's why I am Jesus, that's why I am here!"
Through the story of the conversion of the apostle Paul, God is now telling us: "Believe in the power of Jesus, believe that Jesus can become such a real power in your life! See his transforming power in your life!
Then, secondly, see from this story the patience of Jesus! At the great encounter, the Lord says to Paul or Saul, "It is hard for you to kick against the instinct..." or in a modern word, "against the instinct." Do we know what an instinct is? It's a long, straight, pointed stick that is used to spur a yoke of cattle to go this way or that. When it kicks, the end of the stick digs into its body, causing pain. Saul, too, had been urged for a long time, but he also kicked against it, always wanting to go in a different direction than the one Jesus had led him. He had heard much of Him, the mystery of the cross was no secret to him. How easy it would have been for Jesus to let a disease that was sure to bring death fall upon him, to simply wipe him out of the living with a wave of his hand... Jesus endured, waited a long time. Then one day he came and overcame it with his love.
Brothers and sisters! The long-suffering of our Lord is truly astonishing. The best parent cannot trouble his child as much as God does this world. We, in our great impatience, would be willing, in God's place, to send another deluge upon him: let all wickedness, injustice, cruelty be destroyed! We would be willing to hasten the last judgment, the great showdown. And God is still waiting, still tolerating all the evil that is on this earth. But what is more wonderful, more astonishing, is that He tolerates you and me - and how long He has been urging us to submit to His power! Through every sermon, through every Bible reading, He urges me. Every adversity, every trouble, every suffering, sorrow, or disappointment that comes our way in life is an impulse to turn to Him, to take seriously the following of Christ. Can you tell me how many times He has called you - how many times you have let it pass your ears? Have you asked yourself, "What is my life worth to the glory of God? What does Jesus gain by my living and being? What will be left in eternity of what I am so terribly broken about here on earth?" Have you never felt that you wouldn't mind if God would no longer tolerate you, if He would get tired of you and remove His protection from you, if He would wipe you out of the living with a wave of His hand? I have been many times. And behold, Jesus is still waiting, with unheard of patience still - still no flood comes, still no final judgment is set before Him. The apostle Paul says in one of his letters, "The Lord is longsuffering for us, not willing that some should perish, but that all should repent and live." So He waits with unheard-of patience for your conversion, so that you may finally surrender to Him. Be completely His, for today you can be! The invisible One present through this story is now speaking to us.
Saul at the great encounter fell down in terror at Jesus' invisible feet, "What wilt thou have me to do, Lord?" This is the question of a man who has bowed down before Jesus. Until now Saul thought he could do something to Jesus, harm Him, persecute Him. Now he is terrified, amazed, but he only feels that Jesus has a powerful but merciful hold on him and that Jesus can do with him whatever he wants. Here is the great difference between a religious man and a believer. The religious man always wants to deal with God in some way, wants to use him: to help here and there, to give this and that, to use God's power and strength to achieve his own ends. The believer wants to dedicate himself to God with this question: "What do you want me to do, Lord?" The believer knows very well: it is not I who desire something from God - it is He who desires something from me! I don't have a purpose with Him, He has a purpose with me... It is not me who says: "Lord, do this, don't do that!" But He says: "You do this, don't do that!" He is not at my disposal, but I am at His disposal... I don't have a claim on God, He has a claim on me. Therefore, He holds the reins in His hand and waits for me to say over and over again, "What do You want me to do, Lord?" And when one falls down before the invisible Jesus with this question, I am convinced that it is then that he hears most clearly the voice of His living presence: "I am Jesus, the Jesus to whom all authority in heaven and on earth and in your life has been given, to include you in my service!"
After the great encounter, we read that Saul did not see, eat or drink for three days. During this time he had a good opportunity to look within himself, to overcome all the bitter memories of his journey, and to prepare himself for the apostolic ministry to come. You know, don't you, that there are times in our lives when God takes away our outward vision so that we can see all the more inwardly?! You may be struck by an unexpected blow, you may be taken ill, you may have to lie in bed, the weight of a very painful blow may fall on your soul, the sky may be dark, everything may become hopeless, hopeless, and you may ask: "What now?" But it can be a very blessed guidance if you understand that God wants you to be alone with God and with your conscience, so that you cannot run away into the daily work of life. There are such forced silences.
Such forced silences are the most privileged time to hear with our hearts that heavenly voice: "I am Jesus! I want you to know My power, My patience, and to acknowledge My sovereign claim over you - for I want you to live! That is why I am Jesus - that is why I am here before you now. Do you hear? I am Jesus. I am your redeeming Lord, your God!"
Let us beg Him:
"Speak to me, Lord, for your servant hears your voice!"
So I say, for I myself have long felt that way.
Let me walk in thy ways, and wait for thy heavenly yodeling,
With a true heart, with a true heart, without ceasing.
(Canto 512, verse 1)
Amen.
Date: 19 May 1968 (Evangelization)